OFFICE HUMOUR

We call our boss caterpillar.He got where he is by crawling.
The manager started his speech at 10 a.m. sharp and ended at 11 a.m. dull.
I overheard two dissatisfied colleagues talking today, one was saying that he was going to work for Euro Disney because he was fed up with his present job and wanted to work for a real Mickey Mouse Operation.
My boss didn't come into work today. He called this morning and said he was having a vision problem. When I asked what was wrong, he replied, "I just can't see myself at work today."
You can name your own salary here. I call mine Fred.
We the unwilling, led by the unqualified, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful.
If at first you don't succeed, have you considered becoming a personnel officer?
Performance Reviews"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom.....and has started to dig.""His men would follow him anywhere...but only out of morbid curiosity.""This employee is really not so much of a 'has-been', but more of a definite 'won't be'.""Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.""He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."
I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.
If at first you don't succeed, delegate it.

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